First Haircut

Yesterday my daughter got her first haircut. Problem is she gave it to herself and I wasn't ready for her to get a haircut. Today I have made an appointment for her to get a real cut but am so afraid Angie will have to cut her hair really short to make it look better. I am soooooooooo not ready for that at all. Taryn was born with very little hair and it took FOREVER for her hair to grow. Now she has pretty, long blond hair and I had plans for her hair. I am growing mine out for Locks of Love so thought it would be good to do the same with her hair. It as some thing we were going to do together in a year or two. For her it might not happen now and I am okay with that, just not ready for it. It is killing me to know that I have to take her and have this done but I know it needs to be done. This is just one more first I need to deal with and many more to come. I will be getting a trim too, so thank goodness it was time for me to do so, so now we both will get our haircuts together. :(

This is me, take it or leave me.

This is me, no matter what you think.
I might be a little over sensitive and a bit crazy but this is me.
I might not be the best at everything but I am good at some things.
I like to sing in the car and dance around the house while I listen to my favorite music.
This is me take it or leave me.
I love to be alone but love to be with my friends and family.
There is nothing more I like then being with you but some times I just have to be me.
People in our lives come and go so I try my best not to get attached because then I get hurt over and over again. I choose to be alone and sit in the dark, thinking of who I wish I could be or who I don't wanna be.
I might say the right words but turn around and mess up by saying the wrong words.
This is me take it or leave me.
Nobody in this world is perfect, I sure know I am not.
I mess up ever day of the week but turn around and do my best to be more then I can be.
There are many days that I wish I could just take it or leave me.
Do me a favor it you don't like me then just leave me!

Why?

Why can't you hear me? Why can't you just listen to me? Why do you hear just what you want to hear? I don't feel like I can say a word any more because all you hear is what you want to hear. There is no use talking any more when you just won't listen to what I have to say. There is no use us going on when there is nothing left but silence. Silence is not what we want or need. It's the talking and trying to understand and to start to believe in one another again. This can't go on any more, I feel like I have to leave. You don't understand unless it involves yelling. That the only time you seem to hear what I have to say. I don't want to yell any more, I just want to leave. Leave you in the silence you have created because you just can't hear what I have to say. You can't hear what we need to do to fix what is broken. I just need you to believe, believe in us again. Right now all I want to do is leave.

Silence

Silence is some thing I love but don't get very often. Everyone says when you have kids enjoy them now because some day you will miss them. I know that is true but when I can get that little bit of time, silence, to think, breath and just be, is a luxury no mom gets very often.
There are days I long for the single life again. Not having to worry about what I am going to cook for supper, no toys to clean up, etc. Just to be able to take a bubble bath, light some candles, eat what ever the heck I want and watch what ever sappy movie is on TV alone, is a luxury I don't get very often. I can count on one hand when I have had that happen with in the last 9 years. To tell you the truth, I wouldn't change being a mom for anything in the world. Sure they drive me INSANE pretty much every day but I love them just the same.
I have a 8 yr old, soon to be 9 and a 4 yr old who keep me busy but I would give them the world if I had the money. It won't be long before I am dropping them off for their first day of college or watch then walk down the isle. These days go by way to fast, but every once and a while us moms just need a bit of silence. Speaking of silence, my daughter is yelling MOMMMYYYYY!!! Guess I better go be one. Sigh!

The BLAH of it all.

I just got done taking down my Christmas tree, pictures, plates and other odds and ends that make the house so pretty during the Holidays. I need to come up with some snappy ways to make the house look pretty but not so theme driven for Valentine's Day. Heck, I need a way to make it look good all year around. I have learned to love red, I think that has come with old age. I used to hate the color red, but now I LOVE it. With young kids in the house, it is easy to decorate but it is normally for them and kiddish. After the Holidays it isn't the best time to go out buying tons of red stuff either. I still want to get in on the good after Christmas sales to buy up stuff for next year. :)I love the Holiday Season and can't wait for Christmas to come around again. Just about 10 months to go before we can do it all again.
I am bored now but need to get back to work. Kids are at a friends house and hubby is snoring in the chair. I tried to get him to go in the basement and sleep but no luck there. I suppose I should finish cleaning up the living room so it looks some what put together. Sigh!!!!
I am sure I have bored you all enough anyways. Chow for now!

Oh what the heck!

 A friend of mine posted on her FB page that her dryer has shrunk her pants. We all know how she feels. What is it with dryers? They just don't make them as good as they used to. My advice to her would be to air dry them for now on so they don't shrink. In fact they will fit just like they were never washed. :)
 This is the time of year that everyone makes a resolution to do some thing better for themselves, like diet, but it is so hard to do a diet. If a person starts a diet they don't stay on it or will gain back what they have lost. It isn't about the dieting it is about how much you eat of anything you put into your mouth. I never say diet any more because I am setting myself up to fail. No one should diet, eat in moderation of what ever you like and exercise. Like I am going to do that any time soon.
My daughter has been asking me a lot about what foods are healthy. This is some thing she is picking up more from cartoons then she is me. I try to say it but when we say it they don't hear us. Why is it that when they hear it from one of their favorite characters, they listen? I have done what I can so I guess I will buy her more cartoon movies that she will listen too. I wonder if I can find one on cleaning up after herself? Oh, one with going to bed without fighting or just eating what ever the heck I make for supper? People who make cartoons, get right on that will you?
It is so annoying to see these people who can eat or drink what ever they want and don't gain an ounce, nor do they exercise. I want to be one of those people. :(
I bought a Wii with the Wii Fit a few years ago in hopes I would use it to exercise. That was short lived. It is fun but then when I want to use it someone else has the TV or I have some show I don't wanna miss. Excuses, excuses, excuses.
My blogging time is over for right now. The kids and hubby are in from sledding so back to being a mom. Chow!!

First Time

I have always wondered about blogging, Should I do it? Why would I do it? Is it worth doing?
Sure I know people who blog and have read bits and pieces of their blogs but never really wanted to blog.
Now here I am blogging for the first time but yet I am still a blogging virgin.
I am not sure what I am going to do with this new blog, but for now I will just write and see what happens.
My life isn't very exciting so not sure what to even type. Well I am out of words to type, my mind is a blank.